Adventures in Tailgating: Lipstick on a Pig

If you know me – either personally, through Twitter or this blog – you know I love tailgating. I love beer.  I love Boise State football.  I love food.  I love beer.  Oh and I love my family.  Tailgating combines all of these loves six times every fall as we get together to celebrate before every Bronco home game.

Our family has six spots near the Ram for our tailgating festivities, and when a group of 10 or so people need to get all of their tailgating gear to those spots, you need a tailgating machine to get it all there.

Now there are many nice tailgating vehicles in the Boise State community – fancy paint jobs and wraps, elaborate satellite TV set ups, motorized kegerators etc.  Unfortunately, ours is not one of those.  We have an old 1972 Dodge Balboa that we trust (barely) to get our set-up to the game on Fall Saturdays (or Fridays, or Thursdays, or…).  It does the job, but it is far from fancy:

MohoOur trusty Moho

The Moho, as we like to call it, was originally owned by mom’s boyfriend.  When he first bought it and redecorated it, it was pretty nice.  He painted the cabinets blue and orange, ripped out the carpet and installed blue turf, hung Bronco pennants and pictures inside, and painted blue and orange stripes on the outside.  Over the years we added magnets and stickers to the outside, and various memorabilia to the inside.  Overall it has been a lot of fun and great to have for tailgating.  Sadly, the years have not been kind to her.  Summers in storage, and Winter nights being quickly abandoned after hours in 5 degree weather have taken their toll.  What was once a tailgating machine that we were proud to display around the stadium has deteriorated into a vehicle being compared to other dilapidated vehicles from pop-culture:

Uncle-Rico-and-His-Van                I guess I see the resemblance.

BreakingMuch bigger and much less legal than mine. I like the orange smoke though!

EddiesMine might look a little better.  Plus we don’t have a working toilet so the sh***er is never full!

Needless to say the Moho is not the prettiest tailgating machine out there, but it does the job, and with September 4th and our meeting with Coach Pete and the Huskies quickly approaching, we had to get her ready.

Last night the family got together to get it cleaned up, organized, and stocked with the proper supplies.  We ordered some Papa Murphy’s, bought some beer and Root Beer (not your fathers!), gathered up the cleaning supplies, and….sat in the front yard for an hour drinking beer and staring at the Moho wondering if we can make her prettier.

Eventually we got brave enough to enter and start the project.  First thing we noticed was that we need a new doormat.  This one is getting a little worn out:

Vandal matI am not really sure where this came from , but for years it has been used to wipe mud, snow, stepped on brats and spilled beer from our shoes. After a little discussion we all decided that none of us wants to spend any money buying a Vandal hat, so we will see if we can get one more season out of this and keep our eyes open at the thrift stores.

Once we stepped past the door mat, I decided to open up the roof vent to get some air circulating while we worked.  I was greeted by a family of yellow jackets that had taken up residence in the off-season:

yellow jacketsThis called for some heavy artillery.  Luckily we had a helmet that was worn for Patton’s Army at a tennis match, so I strapped on my cover, grabbed some Raid and quickly defeated the infiltrators.

SGT CancelThe rest of the night was fairly uneventful.  We hosed her down, dusted the insides, reminisced about some of our other tailgating adventures, and dreamed of Maaco paint jobs and spinning hubcaps that  would make our Moho a little more presentable.  Most of these things may never happen, but no matter what, our Moho has been there for all the wins, a few losses, and  three fiesta bowl seasons.  Hopefully she can stay alive for many more.

If you see her, stop on by and say hi.  I will introduce you to my family, maybe share some food and beer, and if you are lucky, give you a tour and have you sign our wall of fame.

She’s not pretty, but she’s ours  – and one of the many things that make Bronco Football such an important part of our life.

Go Broncos!





1 thought on “Adventures in Tailgating: Lipstick on a Pig

  1. Cousin Eddie’s Christmas Vacation equipment is an Epic Neo American Junkster. Go Broncos and Tail Gate in front of your relatives homes.

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